At this point it’s an understatement to say I’m late (very late) to the Jojo Rabbit party. The movie came out last year and was basically the Jewish movie of the year. It had been on my “movies I must watch soon” list for a few months, but I never actually got to it for one reason or another. Last week though, a friend of mine very enthusiastically suggested I sit my ass down and finally watch it, mentioning that he wanted my opinion on the film afterwards… While Aaron and I never actually got to discuss my thoughts on the movie (spoiler alert: I loved it), his insistence in sharing thoughts about it inspired me to actually write this.
For a very long time, I’ve felt like I’m not “Jewish enough”. Being someone who was raised Jewish, by a Jewish adoptive mother, but never having actually had a traditionally Jewish childhood (or Jewish blood, like one of my exes very rudely pointed out once) has always made me feel uneasy about my Jewishness and my claim to this history and heritage. In my small, very-catholic town I’ve proudly always been “the Jewish girl”. To my Jewish friends and some former partners, I’ve been “not-Jewish enough”.
My relationship to Jewishness and my own place in the tribe has always been a bit of a struggle. I proudly wear a star of David around my neck, throw around yiddish words and make challah and matzah ball soup from scratch (even though I hate cooking) anytime I can. I’ve always been stuck in between the two worlds; having to constantly defend my beliefs and my status as a Jew for the past 15 or so years. I mean, I know I can’t be the only “convert” that feels this way. It’s always the same message: just look at how the media constantly portrays Ivanka Trump’s Jewishness - despite my absolute dislike for the woman and her family, her Jewishness shouldn’t be the thing about her we question and criticize), or the joke that is Astrid Weissman, the Catholic turned Jewish, in The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel. It’s exhausting.
But, Ces, what does all of that have to do with the movie you were talking about? Well, you see there’s this line that stuck with me, said by Elsa after being taunted and insulted by Jojo.
“There are no weak Jews. I am descended from those who wrestle angels and kill giants. We were chosen by G’d.”.
My first reaction was to think how beautiful that was, but that it didn’t really apply to me, because I wasn’t really Jewish… and then I corrected myself. I was chosen by G’d. Maybe not by birth, but I was in one way or another, called to join the tribe. I am Jewish not by default, but I am Jewish because I was chosen to be one and because I, too, have chosen every single day to be my best Jewish self.
That line from Jojo Rabbit helped me remember what I’ve known for a long time, and what my friend Rachel (yes, my friends have very stereotypical Jewish names, I know) keeps telling me: blood has nothing to do with how much of a Jew I am. It doesn’t matter how it happened and how I got here. I’m as much of a Jew as Astrid from The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel, as much of a Jew as my friends who went to Jewish camp and Hebrew school, and as every one of my exes who in one way or another told me I wasn't “Jewish enough”. I am Jewish. I am enough. I was chosen as much as I chose to be. Period.
Xo,
C.
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